Sunday, July 13, 2008

“I Don’t Love The New Millennium”




chit-chat from the Chainsaw--
an irregular feature








Don’t get me wrong. The past seven and a half years have been, more or less, good to me. It’s just that I don’t miss them enough to feel nostalgic about them. But VH-1 has scraped the barrel and mined the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s for every single possible event that could warrant a half-assed joke or two. (I’m sorry, but 1983 was not interesting enough to warrant three hour-long specials.) And since presumably nothing of note happened before 1970—and as far as I can tell from history books, nothing did—VH-1 and their third-rate panelists have moved on to the… uh, aughts? Seriously, have we figured out a classification for this decade yet?


I remember when I Love the 90’s first debuted, many snobbish critics decried it, claiming it impossible to be nostalgic for a decade barely over. Little did anyone realize that VH-1 was just being cutting edge and innovative and forward-thinking. After all, in a world driven by instant gratification, why should anyone have to wait to feel nostalgic? Truly, this creative, present-tense approach has come to full fruition with television viewers now longing for a decade that’s not even over! Imagine the possibilities when these network execs find out a way to make us miss the good ol’ days of the future!

Ironically, all of VH-1’s nostalgia shows make me feel nostalgic for the days when they actually played music videos. You know, video hits. One. Remember when it was the music channel for the stodgy old parents of the hip kids who watched MTV? Well, as I’ve officially become a stodgy old parent, I feel like my needs are not currently being met. I’ve tried watching the fresh new, young bands on Fuse or MTV2, and I’m always left with the same thought: Who gave these teabags money to make a video? And it’s not that I don’t think good music is being made these days; I’m just too lazy and stubborn to seek it out. I guess my complaint boils down to what all my complaints boil down to. The world doesn’t do enough to tailor itself to fit my wants.

--A.L. Cerda

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About Us

Buffalo, NY, United States
I am an online journalist/blogger/ freelance writer with a strong background in science and deep interest in indie rock.