the METAL DETECTOR
with Al Wreckless
As every metal fan knows, metal is not just a musical style; it’s a way of life. And it takes commitment. To truly be metal, at least 83% of your world must be classified as metal. Unfortunately, in the modern climate of the world, lines between reality and fiction are blurred more than ever. It’s getting harder and harder to determine what is truly metal. That’s why you need THE METAL DETECTOR.
Today, we take a look at seasonal McDonald’s beverage offering, the Shamrock Shake. This milkshake is a celebration of all things Irish, from its green color to former mascot Uncle O’Grimacey. Primordial would approve. The treat is only available for a limited time each year, which makes you savor each experience as it may be the last one you taste for a while. Guns N’ Roses would approve. Though Axl’s output hasn’t been as consistent as Mickey D’s, so maybe we shouldn’t put too much stock into his opinion.
On the other hand, as with pretty much everything else McDonald’s offers, it leads to the abuse of cows, as they are pumped full of hormones, have the milk sucked dry out of them, then turned over to the slaughterhouse where they become Big Macs. Rise Against would disapprove. But Carnivore would approve. So let’s call that one a wash.
Honestly, Shamrock Shakes aren’t all that metal. But they are delicious, which bumps them up a few points to a score of 5.5 Manowars.
